Hidden Blessings

I haven’t been writing a lot or even talking all that much, but I have been reflecting on my life during most every waking moment. My focus has been on all of the hidden blessings in my life as I continue moving through the grief process. Yesterday I had an amazing day of blessings presented in very subtle ways. It’s why I call them hidden.

Yesterday was the 7th month anniversary of Tim’s death and I had purposely loaded the day with things to keep me busy. But what happened first thing in the morning really surprised me. A man from work who I have bonded with over family vacation photos over the last few years visited me at about 6:30am in my cubicle. I believe he’s only been to my cubicle once before in four and a half years I’ve worked there. He showed the me the latest photos of the incredible property he’s moving to in the Midwest when he retires soon. To say that it has an unbelievable view of God’s creation would be an understatement. Imagine the most beautiful post card you’ve ever seen. He’s moving there with his son and his family and his wife who is in her early 60’s but has early onset Alzheimer’s Disease and can no longer be left alone. It’s worth noting that his first wife died of cancer many years ago, but he’s never lost his faith. Instead of talking about the property and his moving, he talked for the first time ever about listening to God about how he should use his gifts in his new home. Will he host retreats for troubled youth or families of Alzheimer’s patients? He’s still listening for the answer. He also shared a few of the blessings in his life over the years and I was happy to hear them. He then asked me what my plans for the future are with my gifts…. Ummmm, I wasn’t expecting that question. I shared with him that I believe I am already doing the work I’ll be continuing into my “retirement”, and that I’m positive that I’ll be focusing even more with my LEGO hobby, using them to continue to benefit people of all ages in ways that they may not even realize they need. I shared with him my fidget toys I’ve made for dementia patients and he smiled broadly without comment. Then as quickly as he arrived in my cubicle he got up to leave, saying “Don’t forget that we had this conversation!” I most certainly won’t forget and I don’t believe that conversation was an accident.

Then for lunch I walked the few blocks from work to meet Maureen, a great friend from church. She too confirmed the importance of the work I’ve been doing, especially my recent use of technology and apps in my presentations to help dementia patients and the people who care for them. She mentioned that Tim would be incredibly proud of how I’m continuing to focus on our LEGO hobby to heal myself and to help others.

My night ended with dinner with two colleagues with whom I have taught at Webster University for the last 20 years. The three of us were huge contributors to the development of the University’s Security Management Master’s Degree program. One of them brought his wife, who is a network engineer by profession who has home-schooled their two sons for their entire school years. She also volunteers and helps run Nova Labs in Reston, VA, a huge warehouse where kids and adults CREATE beautiful and useful things and tools with a variety of materials. Of course I showed her my LEGO toys and she was fascinated. She commented that the fidget toys I’ve created for dementia patients are amazing in that I already have a niche market and created a product to fill a need, rather than creating a product and then trying to find a market for it as most entrepreneurs do. She invited me to come to the lab and talk about my work with dementia patients to see if the folks who create there have any ideas for things that could help improve the lives of dementia patients and their families. I’m so excited to visit the labs and see the amazing things people are creating there, given that “creating” is one of my all times favorite things to do.

I wasn’t sad at all yesterday. I thought of Tim all day as I knew I would, YET the thoughts were all “guiding” in nature, as if Tim was continuing to confirm that I’m doing all of the right things in my new life alone. I truly believe that my early morning visitor to my cubicle, my lunch discussion with Maureen and the incredible dinner with friends where I learned about an amazing lab I’d never even heard of, were all hidden blessings for me from Tim and from God. It’s always great to receiving confirmation that we’re doing the right things in our lives. I woke up this morning inspired and ready to create! I hope that you find a few hidden blessings in your life too!!


5 thoughts on “Hidden Blessings

  1. Yes, amen, Loretta, confirmation from others of our calling(s) is a grand thing, indeed. Particularly, I think, when it comes unexpectedly, rather than in a reply to a question we ask of others to comment on what they see us doing (although that is grand, too!).

    As I read and reflect on this post, it occurs to me anew, for I’ve thought it before and more than once, that you have forged ahead into a new life with new callings as the pleasant fruit of a difficult seed – that is, your mother’s illness, and then your sister’s death, and then Tim’s death. AND your new callings, each and all, involve your giving yourself in service to, with, and for others, which, as I know something of your life’s story, is the pleasant fruit of the wonderful seeds of loving guidance and counsel you received from your mother and grandparents.

    Marvelous! Simply and profoundly marvelous!

    Carry on!


  2. Hi Loretta, I think of you often, and your name has popped up in my mind over the past few days, wondering how you were doing. Honestly, I really didn’t quite know what to say. Having read your blog, I’m glad you’re doing well and active and busy. Keep on ‘doing’. Carole

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