Growing and Flourishing Activity Professionals Became Part of My Village!

You know that phrase it takes a village right???? We this week I learned that your village is never really complete and you can add as many people to it as you want. I had been looking forward to the South Carolina Activity Professionals Association Conference from the time it was booked last fall. It didn’t hurt that the conference was being held in Myrtle Beach!

I arrived on Tuesday excited to meet Debbie Bouknight who had been my contact since contracting with me. We had emailed a great deal and I was stunned by how she handled every detail with me as a speaker as if I was a nugget of gold! When she arrived at the airport to pick me up, she got out of her van and hugged me and I instantly knew she had become part of my village.

I went to lunch with Debbie and the board of SCAPA, and they were incredible! We laughed and shared stories making me even more excited about the conference that started on Wednesday! The first thing that got my attention was how excited these folks were and how much energy they had! When the conference began I was watching the action of the first sessions from my vendor table from which I was selling my puzzles and fidgets made with LEGO®️.

When one of the speakers began a session of Simon Says the place was just a sea of movement and laughter!! I was laughing hysterically from my seat!

When it was time for me to introduce LEGO®️ Serious Play®️ to the group, I was soooo excited!! It was me and 150 fun folks playing with lots of LEGO bricks! To incorporate their theme of growing and flourishing I deviated from one of my usual introductory builds and had the Activity Professionals build a tree!! The trees were spectacular in that they were colorful and diverse in their stature, height and width! I loved the results of the build so much that I will likely use it in the future. They laughed and cheered for each other as they shared the stories of their builds and even those who had never used LEGO created some awesome builds!

Of course I also had them build JOY and a skill that want to use to continue to flourish in 2024. I learned a lot from those builds and the stories they represented! People were so amazed by LEGO Serious Play and the idea that they could use it with their residents and families! I was ecstatic that I had shared something with them that almost none of them had heard of before.

I had found another village that welcomed me with open arms. At dinner on Wednesday night, several of us talked about my doing a LEGO Serious Play facilitator course in SC so they can share this methodology with others.

Thursday was a really big day for me because I gave three different breakout session presentations back to back separated by an hour for lunch! I rarely do multiple presentations in the same day, BUT this group was worth that effort! They took photos and notes, asked great questions and shared some of their experiences! I just love all of them! Several people commented on how my energy level lasted the entire day and into the night. I went walking after the sessions ended, then got dressed for the banquet which was all about a Garden Party! The outfits and hats folks wore were legendary and I’ll never forget that night! I had great conversations with people and danced quite a bit too!! What FUN!!

The last day of the conference on Friday was awesome, starting with a glorious buffet breakfast and two excellent speakers! I learned a lot from both of them, especially tracking the success of activities with residents, AND dealing with difficult people! I sold a lot of puzzles on the last day and took quite a few orders too!! I was soooo sad when the conference ended! I am thankful for Debbie, Diane, Linda, Amy and Joan who I spent the most time with and I am so thrilled that they welcomed me into their circle so openly!

I thought I was passionate about my work, but I don’t think I hold a candle to these folks!! There were many in the group who had been activity professionals for more than 20 and 30 years, and several who had been doing it for more than 40 years. It was incredible to learn that one of the women in attendance had been doing it for 50 years! Holy Cow!!

I feel blessed that I had that experience this week and that I had a chance to get a lot of walking in too, even though it was more chilly than I had anticipated! I averaged more than 20,000 steps each day and during my walks I tried to process the conversations I had been in, and to recall all of the fun and laughter that I had experienced with this awesome group. When I got home on Saturday night, I felt like I had grown and flourished in so many ways…..I was so full of knowledge and ideas and grateful with the number of new friends I had made! I am thankful that I have added the awesome SCAPA members to my village and I look forward to continuing to build lots of JOY related to what I learned from them this week!! As Spring quickly approaches I hope we can all find something that helps us to Grow and Flourish because it makes life so much more beautiful!!

Move Whatever You Need To Move To Be Where God Needs You To Be, Doing Whatever You Need to Do!

For the past couple of years I’ve attended a Bible Study led by the Rev. Dr. Gayle Fisher Stewart and it is an amazing 90 minutes each week where we learn so much more than what is in the Bible! Last week Gayle gave us the assignment to write a Proverb – and most of us were thinking … “we can’t do that”… but she convinced us that we could. Because of the previous few weeks I’d had, I wrote – “Move whatever you need to move to be where God needs you to be, doing whatever you need to do”. I’ve learned that lesson over and over for the past 6 weeks.

The most significant thing I need to move right now is an infection in my left eye that first arrived in 2017 after I had cataract surgery and stayed in my life for more than a year. Then after receiving a clear bill of eye health in October 2023 from my yearly checkup with my retina specialist, the infection returned seemingly out of nowhere in December 2023. It’s to the point now that if the infection doesn’t respond to my current eye drop and oral pill treatments I’m likely facing cornea transplant surgery. The original eye drop dosage didn’t work so they upped the frequency AND the pills to take orally to fight the viral infection from the inside too.

There was only one problem with that plan…. I have a swallowing deficit diagnosed in the 1990s that has prevented me from swallowing pills whole and I was told this pill couldn’t be crushed. So I really needed to MOVE that inability to swallow pills so I can give myself the best opportunity to resolve the infection. It’s been an absolute struggle but I ordered a couple of items from Amazon to help with swallowing pills and I’ve been able to get the pills down three times a day with lots of prayer! I believe God needs my eyes to be healthy so I can continue my journey.

On Friday February 2, I was to scheduled to facilitate a two-day course to train new facilitators in the LEGO®️ Serious Play®️ methodology in Baltimore. A mile from the church where the course was going to be held, another driver cut me off and ran me into a curb resulting in a flat tire. My first thought was “ok I’m not hurt so let’s just get to the class”. I coasted in my car to the front of the church and got all of my course materials and LEGO bricks loaded into my wagon and waited for the tow truck to come. I started that class on time in spite of the incident because that church was where God needed me to be and the class resulted in three amazing women being certified to lead their own LEGO Serious Play sessions with others in their communities!

Last Sunday February 4th, I moved several meetings to be able to have lunch with a friend who was in town to put flowers on her daughter’s grave. I’m so glad I made that change because after our lunch my friend realized she wasn’t up to going to the cemetery and that she had gotten whatever she needed that day from me and sent me a text saying she was heading back to her home instead of going to the cemetery. I believe that God absolutely had me change my schedule in order to be in that restaurant with her.

I left the restaurant and headed right to a glorious Absalom Jones service that was so JOYFUL I thought the church was going to burst! We were told later that the Episcopal Bishop of Washington said it was one of the best services she’d ever presided over. I need JOY anytime I step into a church building and so I know God put me in that church last week. That service gave me incredible energy to continue to go out and do the work that God has called me to do … bringing Joy to those with dementia and all who care for them!

This past Thursday I went for a walk on a trail I’d never walked along National Harbor, MD. As I walked down a hill near the entrance to the MGM Casino I witnessed an accident caused by a woman turning left into the casino to attend a conference. She hit the car of a man who was on her left whom she didn’t see, causing significant damage to her car. The man she hit wasn’t hurt but he got out of his car and angrily jumped up and down about the damage to his car. My security training kicked in and I sprinted across the three lanes of traffic to ensure that she was OK and to ensure that the other driver wasn’t going to try to hurt her. She never got out of her car, and I stayed with her the 20 minutes it took for the police to arrive and took photos of her car that she could send to her insurance company. I guess I was supposed to walk that trail that day even though I’d never done it. She sent me the most amazing text that night thanking me for all I had done for her, but who wouldn’t have done that?

This past Friday I was back in Baltimore privileged to facilitate a LEGO Serious Play session celebrating early Valentine’s Day for caregivers, sponsored by the Baltimore County Department of Aging and the Greater Maryland Chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association and it was amazing!! I usually always wear purple whenever I speak or facilitate but that day I wore a sweater with hearts that went with our theme of Building Love into Dementia Caregiving!! The LOVE that was in that room that day was literally breathtaking! A radio show host who interviewed me prior to the session was so curious about LEGO Serious Play and how powerful I said it was that he came to participate too!! Two of the caregiver participants brought their loved ones they were caring for to the session with them and they built together, literally warming the hearts of everyone in attendance. One example was a woman and her brother. They built a LEGO model representing them walking together in the gym they had just joined showing everyone they will be working out TOGETHER in the gym throughout his dementia journey. Several participants were in tears by that amazing story and strategy!!

I’m not sure I’ve always listened to God and what I was supposed to be doing, but for whatever reason, now I’m listening all the time. I’m always wondering what will happen next, especially with my left eye but my plan is to just keep listening and being and doing – and I know that no matter what happens with the eye I’m ready. 2024 has had quite the start for me – and I am really looking forward to the next chapter of my journey. I’ll continue to be wherever I need to be doing whatever I need to do!

Dreams Really Do Come True!!

When I became a Certified LEGO®️ Serious Play®️ facilitator in 2014 my dream was to engage with and inspire others using this amazing methodology! Then in early 2016 Tim added a new dream, encouraging me to train and certify others so they could bring joy to thousands more seniors, especially those with dementia! I honestly had never thought of that, but I promised Tim that I would look into what the process would entail and added the possibility of certifying other facilitators to my list of my future dreams. But when Tim died a few months later I thought I’d be burying that dream with him. Little did I know that the dream was only being deferred!

Fast forward to 2021 when I was often delivering multiple LEGO Serious Play sessions virtually during Covid. Dozens of managers and directors began asking me if I could train people on their staffs so they could they could work with their residents and adult day program participants as I was doing so successfully with my Mom and many others. The dream that Tim put into my head in 2016 returned and I slowly began researching and outlining what a LSP Certification program for those working in senior living, adult day and memory care would look like.

On December 10th, after months of lots of life happening and even some self-doubt I boarded a plane bound for Amarillo, Texas with boxes of LEGO®️ Serious Play®️ kits and thousands of assorted bricks and elements.

On Monday and yesterday four Amazing staff members at Park Central Senior Living joined me in a conference room and after lots of hard work that included designing and facilitating mini sessions they became my first group of Certified LEGO®️ Serious Play®️ facilitators! I could not have asked for a better group for my first! They were all engaged, inquisitive and committed! The facilitation session they were each required to give absolutely blew me away!!

At the end of the training I presented their certificates and we even played Pomp and Circumstance!! We hugged and high-fived and I felt as if I had won the lottery!! The Park Central Community is so fortunate to have these amazing women who will help heal, uplift and inspire those they serve and support!

I was so emotional after the course and I shed a few tears on the way back to my suite in one the Park Central communities. At first I didn’t understand why I was crying, but I believe it’s because though it took more than 7 years to become a reality DREAMS REALLY DO COME TRUE! I’m so proud of myself and excited about what 2024 has in store for me and those I will be serving! Thanks Tim!! ❤️❤️

Embracing Living Every Single Day!

My primary goal for 2024 is to blog more often!! I’m so envious of the discipline of my dear friend Paul Roberts Abernathy who puts most blog writers to shame with his very thought-provoking weekly posts and I love reading them especially because his posts include his incredible sermons. When I realized how long it had been since I posted last, I was reminded that my 30 day jaunt from Sept 21 through October 21st that included two weeks across the pond, required that I sit still long enough to write. My apologies to the non-Facebook folks who missed my 30 days of posts, photos and videos of the trip which took me to London, England; Billund, Denmark, home of LEGO; and to the West Coast of the US to Washington and Oregon.

Without a doubt the highlight of the trip was going to LEGO Headquarters, a simply mind-blowing place that has every amenity for their employees that can possibly be thought of (and even some I would never have thought of) like a huge kitchen with six ovens where employees can cook with chefs and then all eat together. And of course there are LEGO bricks throughout the entire new Headquarters building!

The tour came about thanks to an amazing young woman named Diana Godoy, a LEGO employee who is a LinkedIn contact of mine fascinated by my work and offered to give me and my two LSP facilitator buddies Christina and Anat a tour of LEGO HQ, including the factory where LEGO bricks are made and the surrounding towns! Diana gave us an incredible gift of her time and energy and none of us will ever forget it!

Christina, Diana, Me & Anat with our free gifts from the tour!

But I wasn’t just touring in Billund, I was also getting more education to add to my LEGO®️ Serious Play®️facilitator toolbox, taking four days of courses at LEGOLAND in Real Time Purpose and Resilience through Play – both of which were outstanding!

The LEGO House – also known as the Home of the Brick was also magnificent! I’d describe it as the best indoor and outdoor interactive museum / amusement park of all things LEGO! One of the most amazing things about LEGO House was that if you are fortunate enough to get tickets to the restaurant you actually build your order with LEGO bricks and then watch as LEGO robots and chefs make your meal delivered by conveyor belt! Those 7 days in Billund are days I’m never going to forget.

Then it was back across the pond to Seattle Washington where I did two days of presentations (including one ALL -DAY event where I gave 5 different presentations for caregivers) and then moved on to Central Washington where I did three LEGO Serious Play events. In between events I was outdoors most of the time, meeting friends who used to live in DC for hikes and visiting with my cousin Winne and her husband David, and my cousin Wellington whom I had never met in person.

Hiking with my friends from DC now living in Seattle

. Wellington invited me to speak at the church he attends and several of my LinkedIn friends came as well.

Hiked with new friends and got to see Mt. Rainer! Pure joy!

After Washington, I rolled into Oregon where I mostly played!!!

I did do a presentation in Hillsboro, Oregon for the Department of Aging that was recorded in a local TV station and then broadcasted at the end of October as a keynote address at a caregiver conference which I then connected with via Zoom to answer audience questions live!!

That was a blast. Most of the Oregon trip was filled with hiking either alone or with my friend Patty who drove up to see me again after meeting me last year, or hanging out with my cousin Willette who lives literally a mile from the recording studio where the recording took place.

I share the recap of that trip because I came back a different person having experienced so much I had never seen, done or even thought of….. my imagination felt as if it was going to burst!!!! The tip made me even more passionate about LEGO Serious Play than I was before and I didn’t even think that was possible. I was so fortunate to win a Maude Award this year which was announced on September 21st the day I flew to London. Maude Awards are presented to individuals and organizations for their innovative ways of engaging those with dementia and I was selected for using LEGO Serious Play for those living with dementia and those who care for them! I’ve decided that I’ll be using some of the money from the award to share LEGO Serious Play in senior living communities and adult day programs in and around DC who don’t have activity budgets and will be providing fun building sessions for participants in these programs!

November has seemed to have flown by and someone reminded me that time just speeds by for me because I’m simply embracing life every day. I always love November, which may seem odd because I’m always incredibly busy with presentations and LEGO Serious Play sessions because it’s National Family Caregiver Month. This month I did two things for the very first time, presenting LEGO Serious Play to college students at SUNY Orange in NY as part of their Wellness Program to help students Build Resilience and to a 4th grade class in DC for Career Day where I taught them about Alzheimer’s and how I use LEGO bricks with people who have the disease. Those two events highlighted the fact for me that caregivers really do come in all ages because several of the 4th graders and many of the college students help their parents and grandparents care for other loved ones. I also led a soul-stirring Reimagine retreat for the Daughters of Virtue and Victory in Baltimore! Yet another event I won’t forget. The prayer their Pastor Michelle gave will sustain me for all of 2024!

This week I’m heading up to Baltimore, Maryland for a Build Your Brain LEGO Serious Play for Keswick’s Wise and Well program. Then it’s off to Rochester, NY to a community called St John’s Senior Community – Embrace Living!! So looking forward to that! Prior to my LEGO Serious Play event I’ll be getting a tour of the Strong Museum of Play in Rochester!! What could be more fun than that??? How fitting that I’m ending this month at a community focused on Embracing Living – something I try to do every single day!!

This Post is Long and It’s Been a Long Time Coming!

I’m excited to finally be sitting still long enough to write this…. In truth being busy wasn’t the only reason I hadn’t written, for a while I wasn’t in a good headspace to sit and write. I lost my joy for a bit almost right after my last post in June about our magnificent trip to NYC and finally meeting Robin Roberts on the set of Good Morning America! The weeks following that trip had a lot of downs and several unexpected expenses. Two LEGO Serious Play events I had already bought plane tickets for (that included trip insurance) were cancelled and I was denied reimbursement because the tickets were non-refundable. Then my car required a new engine and Joy (my RV) needed a new refrigerator.

I also was very overwhelmed and devasted along with our chapter members when my two-year term as Vice President of the Mid-Atlantic Chapter of RVing Women that began in January was abruptly elevated to President in June due to a heartbreaking diagnosis for our former President. Being President of such an amazing chapter wasn’t anywhere in my plans, especially given my crazy schedule, but great leaders have stepped up to fill the open positions and I will do my best to make our former President and all of our members proud!

Even my planned 10 day trip in June to the Finger Lakes for hiking and sightseeing got cancelled when the kids had an emergency come up that required them to remain in Maryland. I decided to not to go alone and used that time for planning for the rest of the year and saved the money I would have spent at the Finger Lakes for my mega trip coming up next week.

The other major stressor during this time was the necessity for me (once again) to republish my two books Being My Mom’s Mom and Refreshment of the Caregiver’s Spirit. It’s hard to accept when the publisher stops issuing you royalties you have earned and fails to respond to requests for books for you to sell at events. The process requires issuing them a cease and desist letter which is never fun. Lucky for me I was connected on LinkedIn with a woman who worked for my previous publisher until he stopped paying her and the rest of his workers. She and I worked together to get both books into a third edition with all new ISBN numbers (yet another expense) and got them all set up with Amazon! The one bright side of having to go through this process was the fact that it gave me the opportunity to add an Epilogue to Being My Mom’s Mom that covered the last two years of my Mom’s life. Mom would definitely be happy about that! Now I won’t ever have to worry about whether or not the publisher will get me the copies of the books I need prior to an event. I’m now solely in control of my own books and that feels amazing. Whew!

Thankfully things picked up after all that and I had another huge success with a Fellowship night of LEGO Serious Play for family friends from church. It was such a joy to work with this family as they built love and joy! Another event that started me back on the joy path was my first trip to Columbus, Ohio to record a session for Caregiving.com. How that opportunity came to be is a story in itself. The now CEO of Caregiving.com was early in his career when he met me at an event 10 years ago and loved my presentation so much that he kept my business card, and after having promised himself that if he ever held his own conference he’d have me as a speaker, ten years later he found my business card and called and booked me! Who wouldn’t be joyful after that??? Columbus is such a wonderful city too and I explored as much of it as I could on foot and the hotel I stayed in was absolutely glorious! Even better, longtime friends Michelle and LaMarr who now live in Cleveland drove over and spent a day with
me!

Back at home I facilitated a great Memory Cafe event at Legacy Ridge near Dulles Airport. It was so much fun to build with those with dementia, their families and the Legacy Ridge staff! Afterwards I reconnected with a former work colleague for a dinner that lasted almost 3 hours!! Soooo much fun!

One of the greatest joys and something I haven’t even announced yet is that I completed a course to become a Trainer of LEGO Serious Play Facilitators!! I am beyond excited to now be able to help Activity Directors, health care workers, support group facilitators and others to become trained LEGO Serious Play
facilitators!! Let the training begin! I hope to begin offering the training sessions by January at the latest!

I’ve gotten three camping trips with Joy in this season so far, including at Lums Pond in Delaware where I officially ran my first meeting and election of two officers. I thoroughly enjoyed getting to hang out with Norma, one of our newest RVW members and exploring new places with her in Virginia was a lot of
fun!

My bestie Kris Lopez turned 60 in August and the entire family was on hand to celebrate this incredible woman. In addition to her party, two of the BEST events that happened were in celebration of Kris and both were LEGO related! We went to Brick Fair in Chantilly, VA which Kris was attending for the very first
time, AND she found it to be just as exciting and mind-blowing as I always do. A couple of weeks later we headed to Winchester, VA to the Museum of the Shenandoah Valley where Sean Kenney’s LEGO masterpieces of animals and flowers were on display in a gorgeous garden that neither of us had ever been to! After the event we had dinner at Chili’s, a restaurant we used to frequent when we worked together and had spectacular milkshakes from Cook Out for dessert! Back at the hotel, we did what you’d expect us to do, assembled LEGO puzzles for upcoming events! Before heading home we toured Luray Caverns which is always spectacular even if you’ve been there before!

I had been scheduled to do a two-hour LEGO Serious Play event for Tribute at the Glen in Virginia and it was a great event! What I didn’t find out until I was driving to the event, was that a DC TV station would be there and part of their coverage would be LIVE! So a two-hour event turned into 5 hours as they
interviewed me, family attendees who were building with their loved ones who are residents at Tribute and staff of this wonderful community!! It was exhilarating and exhausting getting ready for the LIVE shots, but it was an amazing day and really highlighted how beneficial LEGO Serious Play can be for
those with dementia and all who care for them!

I was able to do two great sessions with very active Seniors – one group at the Senior Center in Cambridge, MD and the other in Ocean Pines, MD. Only a few in attendance had dementia, but most were caregivers who enjoyed building Joy! Many of the participants had never used LEGO before and that made it even better! And back home I attended the Iona Community Day in SE DC, which highlighted all of the services they provide to Southeast DC residents and I answered many questions about how I use LEGO bricks with people with dementia! It was a really fun day seeing so many community members come out for games, food and music!

Last week for the first time ever I was asked to judge an Art Exhibit that focused on Memories at the Arts Center in Ocean City Maryland! It was a really fun (but tough) experience. All three of us judges were present when the winners were announced and it was wonderful to meet all of the really talented
artists! The Stories Love Music organization held its Board Meeting that weekend too, I was able to attend the art event and the Board Meeting the same weekend which I absolutely appreciated!

The rest of the time over the last few months have been working with Kris weekly to assemble my Inspiration kits and puzzles in prep for lots of LEGO Serious Play work for the rest of this month, October and November! I’ve shipped more LEGO bricks over the last two weeks than I’ve ever shipped previously! That’s just amazing! My mega trip starts next week on Sept 13th when I’ll head back to Ocean City for a Stories Love Music gala of Art and Music where I’ll also have a LEGO Play table and some of my own LEGO art pieces I’ve created over the 16 years of our caregiving journey. I’m so excited that
this will be my very first time exhibiting at an Art Show !!!

And Finally ….. thanks to one of the most professional Government employees I’ve ever encountered, I had a wonderful jury duty experience this past Tuesday and almost got selected for a criminal trial that could easily last several weeks. My upcoming travel schedule was the only thing that got me
released from having to serve as a juror in the trial, but only after I recited for the judge the 5 States and 2 Countries I’ll be in for the next 6 weeks – Ocean City, Maryland; Springfield, Illinois; Amarillo Texas; London, England; Billund, Denmark (HQ of LEGO) Seattle, Washington; and Portland Oregon. The
judge thanked me for the work I do and wished me luck on my continued journey!

My goal for this year was to complete a blog post once a month. Got off
track a little with that, BUT I believe I’m back on track! Hope you enjoyed the
recap!

The Longest Day of the Year was also the Perfect Day of the Year!

For the last ten years I’ve always been aware of the longest day of the year because it’s the day of the Alzheimer’s Association largest fundraiser of the year. I loved the motto right away “the day with the most light is the day we fight!” How could anyone not love that?? For the first five years I walked through DC to recognize many of the significant places in Mom’s life averaging 12-20 miles on that day! For the last five years including this year, I’ve built a variety of pieces of art with LEGO bricks!

This year The Longest Day fell on June 21st and the sun rose at 5:43 am and set at 8:37 pm. I knew I would be building LEGO art but until a few weeks before the day I didn’t know I’d be in New York City, one of my favorite places. My Mom was big on education and I am too, so this spring after Kim received a 4.0 at Howard University’s School of Divinity and Kendal graduated from 5th grade I treated them to a quick trip. I was able to get them discount tickets to MJ the Musical on Broadway on the night before The Longest Day in recognition of their achievements. We decided to go up on the 19th so we could have a full couple of days of fun. The first day was amazing, we saw a Chinese herb doctor who assessed Kim and “wrote a prescription” for her that we then watched two pharmacists weigh and prepare 6 big bags that would be boiled and made into tea. We window-shopped, and walked this really cool place called The Highline before ending our day at the Empire State Building for a glorious Sunset Tour!

On the 20th we had more fun, did more window-shopping, and hung out at the very cool Little Island on the Pier! It’s an incredible park in the middle of a huge city that has an outdoor auditorium, meditation areas and several areas of large interactive structures to make music! I then headed to dinner with my friend Josie from the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America where I got a tour of the incredible Apartment designed to keep those with Alzheimer’s Disease safe and engaged. As I sat down with Josie for our dinner, the kids were sitting in their seats on Broadway at the MJ show! And of course, the kids loved every second of that spectacular show!

After I paid for the MJ tickets in early June, I reached out to Gabe, one of the producers for Good Morning America’s Robin Roberts who had interviewed us when we were selected in 2021 for her Thriver Thursday series. Due to Covid, we didn’t get to meet Robin in person so I let Gabe know that we would be in town for a couple of days on the chance that maybe we could meet Robin. He advised that he could give us a tour of the Good Morning America studio and would try to arrange for us to meet Robin too. I didn’t want to get our hopes up, but on June 20th we got the final confirmation of the tour. So on the morning of The Longest Day we walked the 8 minutes from our hotel to the Good Morning America Studio to meet Gabe. Once inside, one of Robin’s managers told us that Robin was really looking forward to meeting us. We hung out in the Green Room chatting with Gabe, and then Robin just strolled right into the room and said “hey”…… as if she’d known us all of our lives! I gave her one of my books which I had signed for her the night before and she was truly touched by the book title and my inscription. Robin chatted with each of us, even examining Kendal’s purse we’d bought the day before and she gave all of us big hugs! Then just like that she said goodbye and then strolled out again, likely not realizing what a huge impact she’d made on each of us.

Then we headed to the 5th Avenue LEGO Store where Kim treated us to designing our own LEGO minifugre! That was a Blast! Before leaving home I made a LEGO model of the design on the Alzheimer’s Association Longest Day shirt and my plan was to take pics throughout the day with that model everywhere we went. We took dozens of pics in the LEGO store with the model and the LEGO Store employees took my information to write about how I use LEGO bricks in my work!

The next stop was the Ice Cream Museum which was Kendal’s choice and that was quite the adventure that included a few cups of ice cream! We even fit in Kim’s bucket list item and had appetizers at Tavern on the Green in Central Park!

After the whirlwind two and a half days it was time to head home, and I was able to post some of the art I made for The Longest Day!! I was soooo happy with my Art Collection and it reminded me of the different facets and phases of Alzheimer’s Disease and the journey! I’m still amazed at how much we actually accomplished this week!! We were people on a mission, laughing, shopping, eating, getting lost on the subway and making memories that I hope will last us a Lifetime – and we were together on The Longest Day – shining our light as part of our fight against Alzheimer’s Disease in NYC!! My Mom would be very proud of the funds we raised and she absolutely would have loved meeting Robin Roberts!!! The Longest Day didn’t seem long at all, in fact for me it was The Perfect Day!

Building Our Own Way to Resilience!

This evening I finally finished going through almost 5 hours of video I filmed last Wednesday May 31st at Keswick Multi-Care Center in Baltimore, Maryland. As everyone knows by now I LOVE facilitating LEGO Serious Play sessions, but no matter what methodology you’re teaching or facilitating you can always learn something new! Typically LEGO Serious Play sessions are 90 minutes to two hours but I was asked to facilitate five different sessions for Keswick staff on Resilience BUT because of their responsibilities for patient care each session could ONLY be 30 minutes in length. While I believe that I can do almost anything, the thought of trying to make an impact on resilience (especially after Covid) in 30 minutes was intimidating. When I arrived with Jane Marks my partner from Johns Hopkins we met briefly with the Keswick Executive Director to set up the day. Instead of five sessions that had been previously scheduled, we immediately realized they weren’t going to be enough, so two more sessions were added, once before lunch at one at the end of the day. I LOVED how it was set up, it wasn’t just for medical staff who worked with patients, all other positions were included too – social workers, housekeepers, therapists and even the chef!! The LEGO Group designed LEGO Serious Play more than 20 years ago to ensure that unlike typical meetings EVERYONE would be included in organizational meetings and ALL voices are heard in each session, so I was thrilled that Keswick was following that strategy without it being aware of it!!

The day started at 9:15 am with 19 members of the Executive Leadership in the Boardroom. That first 30 minute session was going to set the tone for the day, and it was replacing their regular Morning 9am staff meeting. I was nervous as folks started to enter the room, but I was ready. Some of them looked unsure of what they were about to experience but they took their seats anyway. After the first 10 minutes there was laughter and cheering each other on as I had them build a Bridge to Resilience. The results were incredible! But it was the way they listened to, encouraged and cheered for each other as they likely learned things about each other they weren’t aware of.

When that first session was over, I was ecstatic!! I was ready to get to the next session, and we needed to move quickly because there was only 15 minutes between each session. To create the best possible opportunity for as many people to attend the sessions as possible, we moved my laptop and all the LEGO bricks in my wagon and went to each floor. We set up in the dining / activity room and then waited for folks to come to us. Being on the same floor they worked on allowed employees to quickly get to a patient if there was an emergency! During the entire day only one employee had to leave a session to help a patient. Having us go to the employees instead of forcing them to come to a conference room was a brilliant strategy and showed that Keswick really cares about reaching out to their employees! At the end of session #2 we headed to the next floor, and then the next floor before heading to lunch. Due to adding the extra session, we only had an hour for lunch as opposed to the two hours we had planned… but at that point, I was so engaged and excited that I wasn’t even hungry! The responses of each group was better than the previous one.

The non-management staff also arrived looking tentative, and some asked “what kind of training are we doing?” When we shared that we were building things with LEGO bricks and their reaction was like “Oh …. OK”. I thought the LEGO models they built of themselves as a “resilient person” were STUNNING! I watched some of the videos of the stories of their builds several times and will likely watch them several more times, especially when I want to feel more resilient! By the time we finished the seventh session of the afternoon it was 3:15pm and I wasn’t even tired!! The kudos about the LEGO event were rolling through the Center. People were told, “whatever you’re doing, stop and go to that LEGO event!!” and they came! I got more hugs during those sessions than I had since pre-Covid! People were having a blast – there were high-fives, laughter hugs and even a few tears. Several people said they hadn’t felt that energized in a long time and one even mentioned on video that they were going to keep their LEGO bricks in their lockers for when they felt under stress because the session was such a stress-reliever! It felt amazing to reach, connect with and build up 61 folks throughout the day.

It almost made me forget that on the hour drive to the Center that morning the engine light in my car had come on, but all I cared about was getting to the location to do the sessions, and I put it out of my mind saying I would worry about getting home with the car at the end of the day! I did make it the hour back home with the car and then dropped it off at the dealership. I went camping this past weekend and had lots of time to think about my resilient self and why resilience has become my favorite topic to facilitate! For me, it has everything to do with my Mom and I know I got it from her!! I was often told over the 16 years with her disease to plan for her death, YET she always rebounded – we didn’t call her Wonder Woman for nothing!!

Every time I look at one of the video clips from my LEGO Serious Play sessions I’m so proud of this legacy Mom and I created! Who knew you could transform a bag of LEGO into models representing RESILIENCE – overcoming tall obstacles, planting a flag on top of their mountain of success, tending gardens to restore themselves, working with incredible teams to accomplish their goals and having faith and family support to carry them through tough times!

Now I wait for the wait for the final report to determine if my car is going to be resilient too!! The problem is serious but I’m hoping it won’t be a costly as they’ve predicted. I brought that car two weeks after Tim died out of necessity because he drove Mom everywhere and she was unable to get in my small Cadillac. I brought the car that was the closest thing to Tim’s favorite color orange. In the seven years it’s been in my life it’s gotten me safely up and down the East Coast as I’ve spoken about our journey with dementia. On June 21st I’ll be participating in my 11th The Longest Day fundraiser and I hope my little Spunky car can get me to where I will be building Art Against Alzheimer’s with LEGO bricks. But if repairing my car isn’t in the cards, in honor of my Mom and Tim I’ll be resilient and just build another solution!

Traveling, Sharing, Living and Loving!

I can’t believe it’s been almost two months since I’ve written a blog post! But wow have I been busy and some of the time was a blur as I moved from place to place. In the ten days after the Kaiser event from my last post, I appeared on four podcasts hosted by awesome women and participated in two panels about clinical trials.

Then it was off to Atlanta at the end of March to the On Aging Conference for what was supposed to be a ninety-minute presentation called Living Creatively with Dementia with Emily Kearns from Dementia Friendly Baltimore County. Unfortunately things didn’t go as planned and we were not in a presentation room at all, but a huge ballroom with two dozen other groups of speakers who also believed they were giving 90 minute presentations. BUT Emily and I made the best of the crazy situation and while Emily found chairs for our “resource table” and shuffled people in and out of the seats, I led four 15 minute mini-sessions of LEGO Serious Play to illustrate how I use it with people with dementia and their caregivers. Our 75 minutes on the fly was a HUGE success and showed that we could conquer everything thrown at us! Even better, a person who attended one of those sessions awarded me a huge LEGO Serious Play contract job for this coming November! Sometimes even when things don’t go as planned there’s still a great outcome if you find a way to overcome great challenges!

After Atlanta I had family time with the kids for a Friday Movie night and then took Kendal the following weekend to the White House Garden Tour, a first for both of us and we had a blast!!

I gave a presentation for Morgan State University’s Center for Urban Health Disparities Research and Innovation in Baltimore on using LEGO bricks with those with dementia, and led two Wednesday Club Memory Sessions for the participants in the very successful Sibley Hospital Program. I was also able to introduce LEGO Serious Play to several new groups 1) a Legacy Friday night event for the family of a healthcare networking colleague 2) a fellow Prince George’s County resident whose wife was seeking an activity that would hold his attention for longer than 5 minutes (he played for 2 hours) and 3) for the great residents of one of my favorite group homes, JK House of Grace! Each session was unique and full of fun, laughter and both old and new memories were made.

Then it was off to the Eastern Shore for the Stories Love Music Board Meeting and I was able to stay the for the entire weekend for fun at Mike and (fellow board member) Mary Ellen’s B&B. After the Board meeting we headed off to Assateague State Park and saw lots of horses and got lots of steps in on the beach and along the gorgeous trails. What a fun weekend that was!

It was then time to enjoy the first camping trip of the season with my RVing Women sisters and we had a blast! It was a great rest period too in preparation for two upcoming trips! My sister / friend Kris Lopez made one of my dreams come true of adding a LEGO demo at the end of my presentation called Building Joyful Caregiver Experiences with Humility, Hope and Humor by assembling 500 little LEGO kits with very little notice. Three hundred of those LEGO kits were for the Arizona Assisted Living Association Conference participants. I had intended to go sightseeing when I arrived in Phoenix but the resort was so beautiful I decided to stay there for the entire conference and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. It was an amazing conference with lots of sessions over three days and my session was so much fun ( as you can see from the audience holding up the LEGO models that they built on what they learned from my presentation) that I received the only standing ovation of the conference. The energy in that room was some of the best I’ve ever experienced!

I was home from Phoenix for an entire 8 hours before I had to speak at the 30th Anniversary Caregiver Conference in Charles County Maryland. The other 200 of the LEGO kits that Kris prepared were for this group, and like the group in Phoenix they enjoyed the exercise immensely too!

Then it was family time with the Lopez family and we trekked to upstate New York to spread Kris’ son Bobby’s ashes after his death from a brain tumor last September. We stayed in a gorgeous B&B next to a huge waterfall and got some hiking in too. I am thrilled I was able to be with my family during that time!

I was home long enough to do a load of laundry before speaking at Making a Difference in the Lives of People With Dementia Conference in York, PA! I’ve spoken there several times and it is always a fabulous time, and I get to spend the night with my Schmid family friends before the conference!

At the end of the conference I got the best treat ever!! My friend Alison took me from York to Shrewsbury which was on my way back to Maryland to a former bank and library turned coffee, baked goods and ice cream shop that’s one of the best I’ve ever been in. The ambiance is incredible and we ate our ice cream in what used to be the vault of the bank!! WOW!!

My last event prior two my two full days off this weekend was for Iona Senior Services in DC! I led their Support Group in a great LEGO Serious Play session and it was truly one of the most powerful and emotional sessions I’ve done. I’m now enjoying my time off with my second favorite passion of writing!

I wish I had tracked my air and driving miles over the last 7 weeks but I didn’t, but suffice it to say I put in a lot of miles and hours and I learned not to go so long between blog posts! I strive to be more like my friend Paul Roberts Abernathy (whose blog I love) because he adds to his blog frequently and keeps them much shorter than mine! In some ways I’m glad I waited this long because it demonstrates that though I worked and traveled a lot, I also saw a lot of awesome sights and experienced total relaxation in some gorgeous environments both indoors and outside! I learned so much over this time about myself and others and literally met hundreds of new friends! I got to spend special time with family where we shared food, fellowship and grief and showed each other unconditional love! For me it was all the perfect blend of Traveling, Sharing Living, and Loving!

Thriving After 60 In My Own Backyard!

On March 11 I experienced two new things…Being the Keynote Speaker at an event in Prince Georges County, Maryland where I live, and working for the first time ever with the Health Care giant Kaiser Permanente. This event called Thriving After 60 (TA60) came about thanks to a recommendation from Positive Aging’s Steve Gurney! I was really excited because the theme of the event was right up my alley – Engage, Enlighten, Empower! During a meeting with Victoria, the Executive Events Manager I was asked to speak about Mental Health and the Caregiver that would include a focus on the importance of self-care for our mental health so my final product was based on my recent research into mental health and caregiving and parts from my own journey with my sister and Mom.

I shared with Victoria that I’d arrive at 8:30am to get all set up for the 10am start of the event, and when I arrived at the Marriott Hotel and Conference Center thirty minutes from my home I was surprised at how large the ballroom was! Also surprising was the fact that people had already arrived for the event. There was much activity buzzing in the ballroom with continental breakfast being served while the talented hotel staff hooked up my laptop, attached the microphone and delivered a brief instruction on the clicker / laser pointer.

I walked around the ballroom and met lots of participants as they enjoyed their juice, coffee, pastries and bagels. Many people I met were very excited to see a keynote speaker who looked like them, others had driven more than two hours to participate in the sessions. As the ballroom quickly filled up I was thrilled to see most every ethnicity represented and I happily posed for more selfies with people since the beginning of COVID! I was so happy to see that many people also brought the person they were caring for with them and many of them wanted to hug me!

With the ballroom almost totally filled, the event began with an amazing woman named Prisna who led participants with lively chair exercises and she was totally awesome! I thoroughly enjoyed giving the keynote and everyone was totally engaged! There was lots of laughter, hand raising and clapping and lots of head nodding too! Afterwards, many people stood up to cheer for me and I cheered for them and the superhero job they are doing on a daily basis!

The response I received after my speech was amazing and everyone shared how inspiring and empowering it was for them and they felt more hopeful about aging and caring for themselves as well! Lots of people shared their caregiver stories and asked questions and I hung out with them as others left the ballroom to attend the breakout sessions. I had planned on attending the session on Solo Aging since I am definitely going to be aging alone, BUT I decided to catch the next session after lunch rather than leave in the middle of someone’s story. Some of the stories were heartbreaking and I tried to point them to the services they needed! I met new friends, including a few who live within blocks of me! I love that I was able to connect with folks who now know they can call on me if necessary!

I had lunch at my table with folks I’d met earlier in the morning, and they all shared how much they LOVED my speech and how proud they were that I was their tablemate! I loved hearing their stories too and I will definitely stay in touch with them! There was an awesome DJ who played great music during lunch and lots of hand dancing and line dancing too!! These folks know how to have fun at an event and I’m thankful I got to witness the Thriving After 60 crowd in person!

After more talking and some dancing I did make it to the afternoon session of Solo Aging and it was full of lots of information that I needed! The outstanding panel session led by Steve Gurney was the perfect end to an unforgettable day! Everyone knows how much I love to travel but it was absolutely WONDERFUL not to have to drive or fly to another state and to share such joy with folks in the County I’ve lived in for 36 years!! I felt loved and embraced and I hope they felt the same from me! Kaiser Permanente was thrilled with my participation and I believe there will be more collaborations in the future! I’m very thankful I had this opportunity because a few months ago I never imagined that I’d be Thriving After 60 right here in my own backyard!

Framing the Caregiver Journey!

My Mom Doris would often say “that photo needs a frame” about the thousands of photos I’d show her from my many travels or of our fun adventures with family and friends. I inherited my photography hobby from Mom who even did a photography project of developing her own photos in her senior year of high school in 1947. When Mom was diagnosed with dementia in 2006, I began writing down and photographing almost everything because I wanted to save (and in many cases, savor) all the steps along the journey.

Sixteen years is a long time, but I believed that each phase of our journey should be framed in some way, shape or form. Some of the photos I loved of me and Mom I did put in a frame, but for other phases, especially when there was a stressful event, I would build a LEGO model to represent it since LEGO building was our favorite activity. It was incredibly helpful not only to build the event itself, but I’d also build strategies of how to handle the situation we were facing. Using that process of building events and strategies not only helped me and mom lessen our stress it also brought us lots of joy!

When Mom died on January 31, 2022, I began searching for some of the best photos which characterized the different phases of our journey. One of the photos of significance was Mom standing in front of the group home called Mamie’s Loving Care on the day I moved her from her non-assisted living apartment. The photo was significant because it marked the end of her ability to live alone. I wanted to frame that as a milestone to ensure I did not to let Mom’s decline lessen my resiliency or perseverance in our fight against this disease, it simply became a reminder to pour more love and joy into Mom.

I was already using LEGO Serious Play with family and professional caregivers and I began wondering what types of situations and events they would “frame” along their journeys. I also researched how resiliency and perseverance impact caregiver’s journeys. I started developing a program called “Frame Your Journey” in memory of Mom that would focus on Joy, Resilience and Perseverance and would conclude with a LEGO building exercise where the caregiver would build a segment of their journey onto a LEGO plate that would serve as the frame. I also wanted to encourage caregivers to continue to build segments along their journey by taking the previous build apart and building the new segment. For me, taking a LEGO model apart and building something else has always felt like therapy to me. It not only was a calming activity, it also allowed me to plan and prepare to be a better caregiver.

A few months ago my partner at Johns Hopkins asked me to give a presentation that recognized the resilience and perseverance of caregivers in their ElderPlus and Called to Care programs. I happily agreed to do that, but also suggested that to make the presentation interactive I wanted to end the event with a LEGO building exercise where participants would build a model that “Framed Their Journey” from whatever portion of the journey they wanted to focus on.

This week on Thursday February 9^th, five people gathered online and 15 people arrived in-person at Hopkins Bayview in Baltimore to Frame Their Journey. I was so excited because I’d been preparing for this day for weeks with my best friend Kris Lopez who worked tirelessly with me to assemble the kits and pack the little containers of assorted bricks. Each participant received a 10 x 10 inch LEGO plate, and those attending in person got to choose the color of their plate. Each in-person participant also received my Inspiration Kit with 47 LEGO pieces, a small container filled with bricks and there was a tub of  extra bricks on their tables to use to “frame their journey”. Those who registered to attend online were mailed a LEGO plate and my Inspiration kit in advance of the program.

After all my research, planning and preparation I had hoped that everyone would have a good time and feel supported. The day was extra special because Kris was going to be with me and would get to experience one of my presentations AND LEGO building for the very first time. She’s put together hundreds of my kits at this point but had never actually done any LEGO building!

Prior to the start of the event there were a few technical glitches in the conference room, but we didn’t let anything slow us down. We made quick adjustments and pressed on and the event was better than I could ever have imagined. Everyone said they loved the lecture portion of the event but then it was time for the interactive part of the session! For many in the room sitting in front of a LEGO plate in attempt to build something significant in their caregiving journey (good or bad) was a challenging task, BUT one that they embraced with great enthusiasm! During the 15 minutes they were given to build, participants looked at each other’s pieces, rummaged through the buckets of bricks on each table to find just that right piece and they traded pieces with each other too! Listening to those who were online working on their builds was really fun too and there was lots of laughter!!

When I announced that the building time had expired, the online participants were first to share their LEGO frames and the story of their journey. We all clapped and cheered as the stories were truly powerful. As those in the conference room began to share they were asked to stand near the camera to ensure those online would be able to see each Frame that was being shared! I’ve experienced great emotion in the rooms of my LEGO Serious Play sessions which typically has three rounds of building, but the Framing Your Journey session only has one building exercise about a significant part of someone’s life. There was lots of laughter and lots of tears too! The journeys that were framed included a young person who had cared for a sibling, caring for more than one parent or multiple relatives at the same time, those who had lost parents or a child and were finding their way without them, those who recognized the importance of meeting their loved one where they are in their dementia journey, those who built activities they do with their loved ones and even friends who were helping their friends care for family members. I loved the bricks they used – doors and windows to represent new opportunities and have doors opened to them to receive dementia education, flowers to represent love, growth and good times! They built bridges to illustrate how many people it takes to provide care for a loved one and the bridges they have to cross to get the services they need. Lots of people used the slanted LEGO pieces to represent the ups and downs of caregiving. Everyone clapped and supported each other as each participant went back to their seats. There were quite a few hugs exchanged too!

Almost everyone who participated mentioned how important the ElderPlus program was to them and those they care for, reinforcing for me in a huge way the importance of Support Groups and Programs and the role these programs play in allowing caregivers to persevere and find joy even under extremely challenging circumstances! Before the event was even half over I knew I was going to offer this program again! By yesterday afternoon I had already received requests for additional sessions!

The greatest joy of the day for me was having Kris with me on the ride to Baltimore, and to help with the room set up and for her to see what all her hard work of assembling LEGO kits actually results in! It was amazing listening to Kris explain her build since she’s the person in the room I know the best and I actually experienced with her much of the journey she shared!

If each of us had to Frame the Journey of our lives, I wonder what we’d each build. I’m so proud of this program because it’s one I built to honor my Mom and her love of family memories and photo frames! I unfortunately don’t have many pictures Mom took as she threw away thousands of photos as her dementia progressed because she no longer remembered who the people in the photos were, including me. Because of that experience I always encourage families to put treasured photos in a place where they will be safe so memories can be preserved. Even though I no longer have those photos, I can still build the important phases of our journey from my memory. So many people have supported me along my journey and as I continue on I will likely build a model that “frames” all of you and the love and support you’ve given me and the memories we’ve made along this journey through life! Sending you much love as you each continue along your journeys as well!